what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Randomize
