Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
my being single is dangerous.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize
