I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
They left me at home... I'm a liability
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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