the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Randomize
