i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
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