Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
