Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
you win again, gameday.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
My life is pants optional.
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