Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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