Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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