Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
