he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
