I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Semen is not good for contacts.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Randomize
