oh god the rape fog is back!
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize