I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Randomize
