nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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