And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
