I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
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