So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I had to cum in my sink.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
