I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
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