You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Randomize
