I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
