Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize