We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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