Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Randomize
