So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Randomize