The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Randomize
