after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Randomize
