Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
