i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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