end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
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