just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
