You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
