I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
