I feel like abortions should bother me more
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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