Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize
