I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
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