Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
