break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
This girl is more easily done than said...
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
