People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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