dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
