the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
