He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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