Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Randomize
