Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Let's get the cat blown out
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
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