so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
You left your phone here
Wait...
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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