was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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