I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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