just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Randomize
