She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Randomize