Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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